“Pag bata ka, masyado kang madrama. Pagtanda mo, saka mo lang ma-rirealize na ang corny mo.” *
— Ramon Bautista, Bakit ‘Di Ka Crush ng Crush Mo
Recently I had a major upheaval in my life. I needed to sort out my feelings, and it occurred to me that blogging about it might help. But I looked back at my old blog, which has not been updated in the last two years, and I realized two things: 1) how different I am now from who I was then, and 2) I want to leave my underlying bitterness - so evident in my old posts - behind.
Hence, I present to you my new blog.
I no longer want to be the writer who writes for herself and pours out her bitterness for the world to ignore. Now, I want to write how I feel, but for me to understand it and share with people. If Sara Bareilles can put out a brilliant sophomore album with all the heartache in her lyrics, so should I be able to put down my fears, confusion, regrets and guilt, without driving people away.
I will be 35 in six months. I started blogging earnestly when I was going through my quarter-life crisis, but was unable to leave it behind. Ten years is a long time to hold on to that feeling. The same problems will still be there, but I know that so much has happened since then and it’s time for me to really grow up.
My name is Kristin and I am starting over.
Soundtrack: Sara Bareilles, Kaleidoscope Heart
* "When you’re young, you’re too emotional. When you get older, that’s when you realize how corny you were.”
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