Skip to main content

Leaving yesterday behind

Stop this train
I want to get off and go home again
I can't take the speed it's moving in
I know I can't
But honestly, won't someone stop this train
- John Mayer, Stop This Train


I am so ready to leave 2013 behind.

All these major upheavals have made me realize so much that I am not ready to realize about myself - one of them, me not being ready to realize these things.

I feel as lost as ever, not having an anchor or a compass or whatever, just floating along taking whatever is coming and taking shelter from fire and brimstone the best I can.

It is no way to live.

I don't believe in resolutions anymore - anyone who has problems with self-discipline gets disillusioned at some point.  But I can't help hoping, and try to plead my case to Someone to show me how to take charge of my life.

Bring it on, 2014.  We'll see who wins this round.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

It's just another New Year's Eve

The last several months have been, in a nutshell, quite stressful.  My friends at work have gotten used to me staring off at a distance while in conversation, or just looking plain distracted.  Though things are not yet ok, I feel a bit o relief that  somehow I'm here, I made it to this point. So last Tuesday, while we celebrated the last official working day of the year, my work friend Charmie encouraged me to take up other interests again. Then she revealed that she and her friend will start blogging, which led to me showing her my angst-filled old blog - I derived great amusement afterward reading back on those old posts.  Which leads me to today. It's been exactly two years since my last post. Though I'm unsure I'm still enthusiastic about blogging as I was before, I want to develop new habits that will lead to a better, more well-rounded existence. I've had enough of putting one thing first almost all the time. It's time to learn to prioritize and ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Silence speaks a thousand words

I've been back to living in my favorite city for almost three years now, and it just occurred to me that I've never made full use of my balcony. So now I'm here, sitting right outside my door, tilting my chair back to ease the pressure on my bum, feeling the longed-for chill of a January evening.  At this time of the night the roads are no longer chaotic, and the city is almost at peace. It is a rare moment of respite out of a very trying time.  It's moments like these that lend me that extra dose of strength that I needed. Thank God for small miracles.
Post a Comment
Read more

Thank goodness for friends

Today was a public holiday, and I had decided to stay in the city and not go home for the day.  My mum implored me to try and have a good amount of rest.   I wish I could have a day where I could just lay in bed all day, but most likely I would end up at a mall out of boredom. We all have friends who serve different purposes in our life.  There are toxic friends, and there are good time friends.  Then there are the friends who are keepers, and I met with two of them today. The second one I met with today is one of my oldest friends.  We officially started our friendship on the first day of high school.  Our friendship had experienced rough sailing, like most teenage friendships have, and we haven't been close for many years when we started making our way into the world.  But despite the distance between us, whether physical or otherwise, I know that I can rely on our connection and common understanding when I needed her kind of wisdom.   ...
Post a Comment
Read more